Wednesday, January 25, 2006


Yesterday, the doctor's office recommended "Butt Paste" - a salve of equal parts hydrocortisone, neosporin and lamisil - for Lumpyhead's diaper rash. Bump was more than a little unnerved that two of the three ingredients for Butt Paste have warnings on their packaging that they're not to be used on diaper rash.

While mixing it, Bump declared that it looked more like frosting than paste - so we snickered over "buttercream." Because, com'on, buttercream is funny.

The ass icing is working wonders, and Lumpyhead doesn't even demand the kitchen sink bidet any more, he'll tolerate a wipe. He no longer looks like he's suffering from a very strange venereal disease, and his mood is much improved.

Plus, he's no longer pooping every fifteen minutes, so that's good. My parents leave tomorrow, and I'll be back at work, so Bump will be back on his own. I think he's looking forward to having all of us out of the house so he can have Lumpyhead all to himself again.

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