Friday, August 21, 2009


I'm a Vikings fan.

I'm in denial, so don't mention the quarterback situation to me.

La la la, Axel is not listening to Jeffrey, la la la la lah.

Really. I don't want to talk about it.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009


I have never had a baby Nathan Jr's age without being pregnant.


[Dot shakes fists at sky]

Monday, August 17, 2009

A Riddle

The lead singer of Led Zeppelin, a peace lily, and Nathan Jr.

Give up?

Answer: Robert Plant, Potted Plant*, and Face Plant

Upon our return from vacation, Nathan Jr decided to exit the baby pool, face-first. After the requisite cuddles and kisses and bacitracin application, I put the baby back in the pool and he immediately tried to do it again.

He's clearly a genius.

Bump calls it the Baby Soul Patch.

*I almost went with "Oliver North's lawyer," but figured no one would get that.

Monday, August 10, 2009

Two Thirds

Lumpyhead quickly lost interest in the puzzle, so Bump sat down to help him.

"This is missing some pieces," Bump said.

"It's a beach puzzle," I shrugged. "What do you expect?"

"No, I mean it's missing a lot of pieces," Bump insisted.

Certain that my husband was flailing on a simple 100 piece puzzle, I sat down too. Lumpyhead cheered us on.

Then we finished it.
Saddest. Puzzle. Ever.

Even for a beach puzzle, this is missing a lot of pieces. Bump counted 35 spaces.

But we're having such a nice time we don't mind a lame puzzle. It's Bump's birthday today, and as usual I have prepared a present of Big Fat Nothing. (Happy Birthday Sweetie! Surprise! You're under-appreciated!)

The drive down was a roller coaster of GPS win, GPS FAIL, and road hotel horror. I'll tell you about it later. In the meantime:

I'm at the beach with Aunt Bob and you're not. Hahah, Suckers.

Tuesday, August 04, 2009


What do you do with your trash?

For twelve years we brought our trash to a basement trash room, where it was picked up several times a week. Last year we kept a covered trash bin in the carport, with lots of shade and air circulating.

We still have a covered wheeled trash bin, but I don't know what to do with it.

First we kept it in the garage, but it didn't take long for the garage to smell like trash. So now we keep the bin in the driveway, where it sits in the sun all day.

Hey, guess what? Sun + poop + meat = dear LORD somebody do something about that odor. We had to move the can to the side of the house because the stench was so awful.

So, what do you do? What should I do? (Other than potty training all the children, because I'm working on it already. God.)

Monday, August 03, 2009

Profoundly Gifted

Sure, Lumpyhead has been able to read for six months, but Nathan Jr has already mastered the outstretched arm self-portrait.
Happy Birthday ta ME, betches.

Now, if I can just teach Lula to type, I'll never have to blog again.