By Bump
Our exam room had a scale. It had been a while since I’d been on one, so I decided to weigh myself. I’d lost a few pounds after Lumpyhead was born—not a lot, but enough so that people commented on it and my pants kept sliding down my butt. This was partly because LHM was burning so many calories with breastfeeding that she was eating my leftovers for once, not vice versa; and partly because being a stay-at-home dad afforded me little opportunity to snack. Or eat lunch, for that matter.
298? Two-hundred and ninety-freakin-eight pounds?!?!?!? I was stunned. I mean, I know I’ve been indulging my sweet tooth a bit too regularly lately, but this is ridiculous. I need to go on a diet ASAP. Exercise. The whole nine yards. Holy crap.
Anyway, the rest of the appointment was fine. After a 45 minute wait, we saw the doctor for less than 5 minutes, and we were on our way. It wasn’t until we were in the car that I realized that I’d been holding Lumpyhead when I was on the scale.
[sigh]
What an idiot.
4 comments:
Hi Bump!
I've packed on a few pounds myself. Bring Lumpyhead over here once or twice a week and we can take the kids on a long walk.
Bump, congrats on getting the Lump up to what I can only guess is at least 72 pounds.
That's funny. It's funnier than standing around with a habitual sway even when the baby is nowhere near, or rocking the supermarket trolley.
i'm impressed by bump's accurate awareness that that story is totally blogworthy.
hilarious.
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