Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Let's Go to the Videotape

I'm still feeling pretty feeble about the whole "can't figure out how to burn a damn DVD" thing. We have four hours of Lumpyhead video and a Costco-sized stack of blank DVDs, but lack the appropriate technology to complete the circle.

Here are my options:
1) Get a new computer.

We should get a new machine. The current desktop is probably ten years old and runs Windows 98 for heaven's sake. But we're limping along okay, so we don't need a new computer except for DVD burning. Plus, I'm cheap.

2) Buy one of those DVD recorders.

A low-end model costs $100-$200 at Best Buy. We'd need a firewire cable too, so tack on another $30. It's cheaper than a new computer, but seems like a big pricetag for an appliance with one use.

3) Use Aunt Bob's Mac.

Free. But I really don't want to be that annoying.

4) Record to VHS tapes.

I did this last night. My parents and Bump's grandmother don't have a DVD player yet, so we'd have to do VHS for them anyway. After many, many hours wrestling with 20-year-old technology, I managed to make two videotapes.

This is how I spent my evening:
Assuming I was just a couple minutes away from having things set up, only to be so very, very wrong.
Cursing more.
Flailing with cords and menus. [Dammit! Where is the TV remote? Not that one, the one that came with the TV; the universal remote doesn't have the menu buttons. Fine, I'll just use the buttons on the front of the TV. Fuck, that is cumbersome.]
Checking the footage I thought I dubbed from the camcorder only to discover I was taping the WB. [The double-you-fucking-bee? WTF? Wait, Everwood?]
Watching at least ten minutes of WB programming, because, you know, it sucks you in.
Wishing I had those ten minutes I spent watching Everwood back.
Half-heartedly cursing.
Getting really tired but remaining stupidly committed to finishing this tonight. [Because the VCR isn't ordinarily in the bedroom and it's sitting there in the middle of the room now and I want to get this done and out of the way as soon as possible.]
Realizing that now I'm just being stubborn. [This has been a to-do item since January, and you have to finish it tonight? Yeah. What of it?]
Digging out the manual for the VCR, because, {gritted teeth} goddammit.
Just going to bed already, even though the VCR was still going in the bedroom. [Only to be constantly jolted awake by Lumpyhead squealing on the tape or the TV making this buzzing electronic interference sound.]
Again with the cursing.
Finishing the project at approximately 2:20am.

TV in the bedroom? Old, which is probably why it's making that awful noise. VCR? Not as old as the TV, but com'on, it's a VCeffingR.

I feel like such a dumbshit. Later I'll compose a post on stone tablets and try to figure out how to upload it to Blogger. Cripes.


Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

Dude. You totally should have gone with #3.

Mom at Work said...

really. it's a laptop. you can transport it to your home. #3.

Jess Riley said...

I am totally afraid of technology. If my husband didn't know computers, I'd be lost.

Also, I just got a cell phone on Monday. When I told my best friend she said, "Are you sick or something?" :)

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

When I finally meet Mom at Work (didn't you used to be Mommy at Work?) I'm going to bring my ibook and we can bluetooth stuff to each other - just because it's cool.

tammy said...

When I visit Sarah in July, I will come over & teach you how to make DVD's!

Bump said...

The previous commenters seemed not to bat an eyelash at the fact that you saved--and were able to find & retrieve with minimal effort--the manual for the fVCR (you know what the "f" stands for).

Why would anyone do such a thing? This is technology we all mastered 20 years ago, right?

Dutch said...

I spent an entire weekend just trying to make a DVD menu. I haven't turned my camcorder on in months. I hear you.

Lumpyheadsmom said...

Hey, look everybody! It's Bump!

And in his first comment . . . he makes fun of me.

Obviously this is not technology we "all" mastered 20 years ago. Or maybe we mastered it back then and forgot, because why would someone ever need to use a VCR again, for heaven's sake? It's a damn good thing I kept that manual. Come to think of it, fat lot of help you were during the whole saga, damn you.

Then again, maybe you tried to help, heard Everwood, and fled.

Anonymous said...

fwiw, I thought Bump was complimenting your ability to find the manual. ElectricYoak would let you know that I likely have the manual (for a VCR we no longer own), but would require large excavation equipment to unearth it from the boxes of "to be filed." THAT, my friend, is pat-rattiness.