Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Suckage

NPR pledge drive time again. Grrrr.

This is me, falling to the carpet, kicking and pounding my fists on the floor. Now I’m peeking up, to see if you’re paying attention to my tantrum. No?

Fine, I’ll go do something else.
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Work has been crazy. There is one last big push before Maternity Leave, Part II begins. I’m looking at my time off as a reward, which makes working long hours and weekends a little more palatable. Still sucks though.
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We give Lumpyhead a treat after getting his boogers. After the flailing, squirming, squealing and exertion-farting related to the dreaded booger sucker, I figure he deserves some compensation for being so horribly mistreated.

I used to happily report, “Okay, we’re done!” Then I would ask him, “Now what do we get?”

He would answer, “Tcheet.” He was often sullen after the booger-getting, but would always brighten at the promise of a treat. We originally gave him M&Ms, but Lumpyhead now indicates his preference for mini candy bars.

Lately, I don’t even have to ask the question after nose-mining. I release him from the booger pin and he instantly announces “I get tcheet now.”

Notice that it is not phrased in the form of question.

He has begun to push the envelope of entitlement. After I wiped his runny nose the other day he said “I get tcheet now.” I gave him a single M&M (M?), but insisted it was only because he was cute; the nose-wipe did not qualify him for the candy. I don’t think he understood the distinction.

Yesterday Lumpyhead watched very solemnly as Bump sucked the snot out of Lula’s head. Lumpyhead always gets very serious when Lula cries, so his reaction was not surprising. When Bump put the booger bulb away, Lumpyhead piped up, “I get tcheet now?”

I guess he figured somebody was owed a chocolate bar, dammit, and since Lula couldn’t collect, it might as well be his.

10 comments:

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

So did he get one?

E :) said...

That kid is going to be a millionaire. He is sooooo savvy.

Violet said...

we've tried that booger-sucking when our daughter's got the snots. It seems to work, but she really hates it. I suppose it must feel really weird to have stuff sucked out of your nostrils.

SitDown.BeQuiet.ISaidNo... said...

I am personally a big fan of the booger sucker.

Molly Chase said...

I can't work the booger-sucker at all. My kid learned to blow his nose at day care, so we employ that method now. He calls it "cleanup."

And, the NPR fund drive is making me nuts. Didn't they just have one, like, last week?

Kemp said...

Shrewd kid ya got there...

In the Trenches of Mommyhood said...

I'm a big fan of the snot sucker.

Em said...

Lucy is personally attached to her nasal aspirator, so much so that when it went missing, replacing it failed there was no substitutes for the "blue nose thing." And for her, using it is its own reward. I guess that is messed up.

LHM, you need a CD player in your car for these pledge drives! Get thee hence... Weird... I have to type in the letters npr to post this and prove I am not a robot. it is as if they are listening!

stefanierj said...

CRAP. I totally forgot about the treat idea when we had to put drops in D's eyes last night. Dope slap for me. You'd think I'd remember, since when he went pee-pee on the potty at school and got candy, it's all we heard about for a week. Oh, that and every time he pooped after that--even though it was in his diaper--he demanded candy. I'm sorry, what? Candy is for dropping the kids off at the pool, not for leaving a steamy pile in your drawers.

bozoette said...

Smart kid! BTW, the snot sucker turns into a quite acceptable nasal irrigation device later on, or so I'm told by people who actually do that sort of thing.