Friday, May 02, 2008

Help a Mother Out

I ordered this dress, with plans to wear it to a wedding in late June. It was on sale (woot! 25 bucks!) and I liked the pattern a lot. I received it yesterday.

It fits well in the upper arms and chest. I don't like to call these my "problem" areas, but let's just say they are the places most likely to give me trouble. The length is fine. But it's too small in the belly.

THE BELLY.

Who in the hell makes maternity clothes that are TOO SMALL IN THE BELLY? Is that some sort of sick joke? What the everloving fuck. I'm not even done embiggening yet. (And yes, it is a maternity dress, purchased from a maternity shop with the words "maternity" on the tag, presumably meant for a pregnant woman to wear.)

So, Internet. Answer me this, Do I:
1. Send it back, spending another three bucks on top of the $9 shipping I already paid to send a $25 dress back to the store.

2. Save the $3 and
a) keep the dress and wear it post-partum, when it might fit.
b) put the unworn dress into the donate box, which will go to the next sucker I know who gets herself knocked up.

You got another suggestion? I'm all for 2c's or 1b's or even 3's and 4's. Have at it.

By the way, I still need something to wear to that wedding. I kind of liked this dress, but couldn't bring myself to order it because I kept thinking "As handi-capable as One-Legged Didi was, her no-legged boyfriend was even handi-capabler."

Bonus if you can you find me a special-occasion worthy dress that doesn't show too much non-existent cleavage or flabby upper arm. I'm even willing to pay more than $25.

9 comments:

De in D.C. said...

Gray print wrap-dress at Old Navy for $30
http://www.oldnavy.com/browse/product.do?cid=5870&pid=562616&scid=562616002

Loving this black/white floral print dress from Ann Taylor Loft $50
http://www.anntaylorloft.com/catalog/product.jsp?productId=11846&N=1200142&pCategoryId=619&categoryId=1160&Ns=CATEGORY_SEQ_1160&defaultColorNameFromCategory=Black&defaultSizeTypeFromCategory=Misses

Bunch of cute dresses at Motherhood in the $25-$35 range
http://www.motherhood.com/mastercategory.asp?MasterCategory_Id=6&ViewAll=false

Cute dresses at Target. Especially love the red Kimono and the Azure Blue Flutter Sleeve
http://www.target.com/b/ref=in_se_pagelist/601-4016627-5137746?ie=UTF8&node=162410011&pricerange=&index=tgt-mf-mv&field-browse=162410011&rank=pmrank&viewID=leaf&field-pricebin=&store=&rh=&page=1&fromBrowse=1


As for the one you have, I'd probably keep it and wear it post-partem, but I am a notorious packrat with more than a few items of clothing in my closet that are unworn since my size changed before I had a chance to use them. (IE the pencil skirt I got on sale for $7 while a SAHM, and now that I'm WOTH it doesn't fit.)

merseydotes said...

That second picture makes me think of Amy Poehler rocking one leg, bro.

Xdm said...

Dude. I yer dress right here....(check your email)
xo

Em said...

The one-legged joke made me laugh so hard I teared up.

Please inform the internet when you reach a resolution.

I did buy some things at Target that I liked fer cheap but if I remember correctly they were not exactly amply cut, for maternity wear and I wore them mostly in the 1st trimester.

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

Keep it and give it to the next sucker.

I had lots of maternity stuff that didn't fit my belly.

Anne said...

That's really cute ... definitely keep it! Where did it come from? I would totally order one of those for me, even though I'm not p.g. (Yeah, I'm not proud if the dress is cute and only $25.)

Anne said...

Oh yeah ... also, One-Legged Didi made me laugh so hard that I peed a little bit. Thanks!

Gidge said...

I actually like the red one on your blog.

I think it says SASSY SUMMERTIME!

nonlineargirl said...

If you think you'll wear it post-baby, keep it. You can always give it away later. (It isn't the $3 postage, it is finding the packing tape, filling out the return form, getting it in the mail... too much.)