Bovine Expungiform Replaceopathy

When Bump goes in to retrieve a screaming Lumpyhead, he reports that Lumpyhead is often angrily pointing at Cow.

Lumpyhead received Cow from Bump's cousin Erin, and sleeps with it every night. Cow plays a little song and moves her head from side to side. Cow's greatest feature, however, is the bell around her neck that Lumpyhead likes to chew on. Bump and I foresaw the disaster that would befall our home if anything ever happened to Cow, so we thought we should find a spare.

I purchased one online back in June, and did the super-savvy thing of having it shipped to my Mom's. That way, we wouldn't have to pack Cow in the luggage, yet Lumpyhead would have Cow in Minnesota. I used expedited shipping so the thing would arrive before we did.

Except, we got to Minnesota, and no Cow II. No sign of Cow II. With spotty internet access, I managed to find the company's phone number and call them about Cow II's status. I left three messages and fired off an angry email (which may or may not have been successfully sent).

We left Minnesota with neither Cow II nor any word from the merchant (who has a brick-and-mortar store in Louisiana, so I wasn't worried about fraud, I was just pissy about the poor customer service). After arriving home, I received an email telling me that Cow had been discontinued, the store was out of stock, my order was cancelled and my card was not charged.

Despite the discovery that Cow's absence would not bring total and immediate devastation to Lumpyhead's nighttime world, I soldiered on. To eBay for Cow III! I found one, ordered it, and it arrived.

Except it looks like this:
It's from the same manufacturer, and it looks like Cow, just. . . no music or motion. Also, apparently no skeleton. It's a floppy, flaccid, creepy version of Cow. We're not sure if it will freak Lumpyhead out, or if he won't notice the difference. She has the all-important bell around her neck, after all.

Flaccid Cow III can be posed like Cow, which is why I didn't notice that Flaccid Cow III was in fact, not Cow at all.
Had I read the eBay description carefully, I would have noted that Flaccid Cow III does not play music, but I just never imagined that Gund would make two similar cows - one musical and one not.

I've found another online store that purports to sell Cow, and I've placed an order for Cow IV. We'll see.

Which still doesn't explain why Lumpyhead is so angry with Cow of late. Cow is obviously pissing him off, but we have no idea why. Maybe she's hoarding all the doobage.

Lumpyhead, Cow, and that bad seed Lambie, in happier times.