Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Turns Out You Don’t Even Have to Blog It, You Just Need to Say It

You know the Blog Jinx? The one that dictates the minute you post “Little Carter has always slept well” or “My Julia doesn’t pick her nose,” you’re guaran-damn-teeing that within the week Carter will be waking you up three times a night and Julia will be eating boogers like they’re cheerios.

Hey, guess what? The Blog Jinx works even if you don’t blog it - you just need to say the words out loud.

Last night, I wimped out on Happy Hour, so Aunt Bob came over after all the Tormentors were abed and we drank a bottle of fabulous wine, ate froufy snacks, and played a round of poker. (Bump joined us for the cards and Aunt Bob proceeded to hand us our asses. Cleaned up, she did.)

We were chatting about vomit (because, well. . . never mind why) and Aunt Bob recounted a lovely instance in which her Little Guy threw up so many times in one night she ran out of sheets for him.

Lula has barfed a couple of times, twice managing to hit me square in the chest/neck. Gross.

Then I said this: “I don’t think Lumpyhead has ever thrown up. Bump, how many times has Lumpyhead vomited?”

“Um, never,” Bump replied.

And the gods laughed and laughed and laughed. I’m sure if we had bothered to listen, we could have heard it, their roars of hiccupy, spasmodic, gasping laughter.

Lumpyhead was up all night, puking his little guts out.

He ate spaghetti for dinner last night, in case you’re wondering. I don’t think I’ll ever eat spaghetti again.


Beth Fish said...

You know, I have foods I stopped eating for years because I had to watch them come back up, but I think having to watch someone else do it would definitely turn me off forever. Hope Lumpyhead is better, and be sure to torment him forever about ruining spaghetti for you.

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

Thank God he didn't puke up beer.

Well, for several reasons.

Sarah, again said...

I'd also like to say that Claudia NEVER poops in the potty.

p-man said...

I just ate spaghetti. I am now engaged in an involuntary visualization exercise. Thanks a bunch.

merseydotes said...

Sorry about Lumpyhead but this is a good tip. I'm going to write a whole post about how my daughter never stops whining, all she does is whine, whine, whine. (Will a comment work the same magic?)

Becky said...

I like the way Sarah thinks. My twins NEVER poop in the potty either. Come to think of it, I NEVER win the lottery. My pinch-hitter is NEVER home early. And the rugrats NEVER get along.

Ken and Belly said...

A hex on your blog jinx. (Or I am sooooo screwed.)

Hope Lumpyhead's feeling better soon!

Aunt Bob said...

Sorry dude. That blows.

Em said...

I feel your pain. I still haven't eaten a hot dog yet since Henry had an episode, but it would bum me out to give up spaghetti, so I hope you get over your association more quickly than I did.

Devra said...

I once had a terrible barfing episode involving oranges. To this day I have a difficult time when put in a situation where I am expected to eat oranges.

That kind of experience just stays with a person.