Sunday, January 28, 2007

Tin Roof! Rusted.

Alternate Title: Probably Not the Picture You Were Waiting For

I haven't named her yet.

After her birth, I planned to call Akutaq something else. I chose the nickname Akutaq for many reasons, full of meaning and symbolism, but some people had taken to calling her Shaq Attack. Which I think is pretty funny. The juxtaposition of a large athlete and a tiny Hapa baby? Well, that's pure poetry right there.

Before Akutaq was born, the leading candidate for her post-fetal name was Thrakkorzog. (And you thought Akutaq was difficult to spell.)

Thrakkorzog is a mucous-based life form from another dimension, bent on destroying the world. I think that sums up a baby's job description pretty accurately.

And you can sing this song:
Lumpyhead and Thrakkorzog (doo dah, doo dah)
Lumpyhead and Thrakkorzog (oh dee doo dah day)

So, there was:
1) Thrakkorzog
2) Zog (the short form)
3) or Susan (the diminutive form)

There was 4) Whitey, as suggested by Aunt Bob's Little Guy. Also 5) Lumpyhead 2.

Or 6) Shaq, since some people are going to call her that anyway.

Lumpyhead calls her 7) Hank.

I'm leaning towards Hank.


Anonymous said...

Oh crap! I totally missed the announcement because I was sans internet for a few days.

CONGRATULATIONS! I'm really glad all are healthy and well. I'm so happy for you all. As for the name, perhaps Hankette? Kind of adds a feminine dimension to it all.

Gidge said...

What about Gozer or Cthulu?

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

Lumpyhead calls her Hank?

My kids call her Shaq Attack. I'm just saying... I made them practice A LOT.

Anonymous said...

Hank! Hank! Hank! (then if you are feeling friendly, you can call her Hankie!)

Anonymous said...

I am *totally* partial to Shaq Attack, as it is the natural evolution and funny too, though Susan is really just as funny.

Hank kinda chafes me cuz I have a kid named Henry but I am sure I could get used to it.

Great post post for a great kid.

Bozoette said...

I like Hank as well. You can rhyme it very easily:

There once was a baby named Hank
Whose name never once drew a blank
When she fills up her diaper
Before you can wipe her
You better believe that Hank stank.

Or something like that.