Thursday, October 26, 2006

I Need A Parenting Tivo

As a working parent, I’m not surprised by the sense that I’m missing out on a lot of Lumpyhead’s life. I expected to feel this way. I’m gone for at least 10 of his 12 waking hours during the day, which means I will not be around for stuff.

But lately I feel like I’m not taking full advantage of the little time I get to spend with him, and I didn’t expect that.

On those mornings when Lumpyhead rises before seven, I blearily get him breakfast and spend our first fifteen or thirty minutes together trying to shake the cobwebs out of my head. On those other mornings when I leave before he wakes up, I spend all day pining for those few minutes - foggy or not - that I didn’t get.

When I get home at night, I’m always a little droopy. I feel like I have to power through the hour or two I spend with Lumpyhead before putting him to bed.

I want to be enthusiastic and energetic when I’m with Lumpyhead, able to invent games and sing songs and play.

Instead, I’m tired and boring and slow. I have a tough time heaving my expanded self off the floor to follow Lumpyhead when, after tiring of our current activity, he goes prattling off to another part of the house.

After he’s been asleep for awhile, after I’ve been fed and have spent some time staring at the TV, I miss him. I get a second wind and want a do-over of those minutes when he played with his toys and I just sat beside him with my head on the ottoman. I wish I would have spent that time better.

Rather than watching last night’s episode of Lost, I want to be showing him which stacking cup is blue or encouraging him to say Grandma or giving him kisses. But he’s asleep.


stefanierj said...

Yes, yes, yes, I feel your pain. Can we start a support group? or a marketing focus group for whoever's working on the ParentiVo?

Melissa said...

I feel like this and I'm home with them all day.

Do try to remember that you're especially exhausted from being pregnant right now, and that it will get easier to be a cool/fun/[insert your own adjective here] mom again later.

Em said...

It's OK LHM. Just remember you have to take care of Akutaq too. I know it isn't ideal but once there are two kids in the house they can take turns being ignored, just like my two : )

laurie said...

Boy you nailed it with this one. I bet you'd be hard pressed to find a mom (working, wahm or sahm) who didn't feel this way.

Parenting TiVo is the best idea ever. Submit it as a proposal to Brain, Child and I've got 50 bucks here that says they'll ask you to write an article.

Violet said...

I'm hoping that I'll only ever have to work part-time, so I don't have the same problem.

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

If you are pregnant it doesn't count. You are tired because you are making a baby.

Alison said...

Working full-time and taking care of a toddler while pregnant was the most exhausting condition I've ever experienced. I think I'm still recovering. Can parenting Tivo replay even those nights from last year?

These days I'm exhausted now from nursig a newborn, working full-time and taking care of a three-year-old. It does get easier eventually ... right?