Monday, November 10, 2008

I Hope Julie and Robert Will Be Very Happy Together

We got a wedding invitation in the mail, addressed to our landlord. Bump and I were all "Pffft, they must be very close - they don't even know he moved." He moved in with his girlfriend, with whom the marrying couple is also obviously very close assuming her given name is "and Guest." The envelope flap had torn off in transit (seriously! Although we are totally not above opening mail that's not ours) so I HAD to check out the invitation and judge. And Boy Howdy did I judge.

Bump and I joked about how we should send a gift. Or (along the lines of sending holiday cards to people we don't know [which! I'm totally up for doing again if you send me a name and address]) rsvp to the invite and show up at the wedding of Julie and Robert - who together with their parents sent a kind of shitty invitation - but then we would have to find sitters and endure a ceremony and rubbery chicken in uncomfortable clothes just to get an open bar and oh hell, I'll just buy some liquor and drink it at home.

The next day the mailman delivered what looks to be two birthday cards from Landlord's grandmothers. I am above opening a man's birthday cards from Grandma and stealing the cash.

So we'll give Landlord all his mail the next time he comes by to change the furnace filter or whatever. But DUDE, tell your Grandma you moved. Tell both of them. You might wanna mention it to your friends, too, or at least let the post office know. Because I'm attending the next wedding you and "and guest" get invited to.

I will always let my grandmothers know my current address.

6 comments:

De in D.C. said...

When did landlord move out? Post Office only forwards mail for 6mos, so that time period may be up.

and Awwwww at Nathan Jr. Cute baby grin! My ovaries are aching.

De in D.C. said...

Too much time on Twitter; can't type in complete sentences.

ktjrdn said...

that random stranger idea is freaking hilarious! I love it

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

Is there going to be an open bar? I'll go.

(Will you babysit?)

Em said...

Love Nathan Jr.!

I once opened our home's previous owners Philharmonic tickets by mistake -- I didn't even look at the addressee -- and had to dig out his address. He never even said thanks. We still get mail for his ex-wife, but no cards from grandma.

Fran said...

I know I tell you this almost every time I comment, but you have beautiful children. Nathan Jr. is precious!

Fran